Not You're Ordinary Exotic Dancer

I would like to dedicate this to all breast feeding strippers:
May you never leak on your tan, or squirt a customer in the eye.

I have been lactating and dancing for three months now.
Reoccurring questions:
'Are you JUST a dancer?'
'Do you have a boyfriend?'
'What else do you do with yourself?'
'Why does a girl like you have a job like this?'

...It has become extremely apparent that men (and women) are quite interested in the girl behind the stage name.

My usual answers are:
'I'm between relationships. I live alone in an apartment and I love to play with my pussy (pause) I have a little kitten named Stephanie.'
or
'I never leave. All the girls live here in a giant jacuzzi out the back. We have pillow fights and play with shaving cream and melted chocolate all day.'
or
'If I walk out the front door I evaporate. I'm just a figment of your imagination.'

... these answers are not the truth.
The truth is that while I'm sitting on their lap, naked- I wonder if they have a freudian urge attracted to the smell of my breast milk?

I'm not you're ordinary stripper:
I don't drink (much)
I don't take drugs
I exercise and I make sure I see the sunlight everyday
I eat well
I'm studying to be a Naturopath
I am in a committed relationship
and I have a nine month old baby

I recently learnt that food generally looks like the part of the body it's good for. This can be traced back to the days of hunter/gatherers, when people gathering food could develop an understanding of its' benefits.  For example, walnuts look like a brain, so they are good for the brain. When an avocado is cut in half, it's profile looks like a pregnant woman, so that means avocados are good for pregnant women. I also read somewhere that the red dye from avocado seed is dangerous for pregnant women and should be avoided! There is goodness and poison in everything-  in everyone. Balancing our yin and yang is the key to happiness.

Some people may see my life as conflicting, but I see it as harmonious. I feel balanced, happy and although I never predicted my life to be like this, I have landed in a whirlwind of extraordinarily imperfect perfection!